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馃挬 20 Dark Humor Jokes To Laugh Out Loud

Dark humor is not for everyone, try it.
Read these dark humor jokes that will make you laugh out loud

 

Dark Humor Jokes

Dark humor jokes are not everyone's cup of tea, and not everyone has a taste for them. These type of jokes require a bit more emotional control and science has proven that people who get dark jokes usually have higher IQs. So, if you laugh at any of these jokes, you are probably smarter than the average. 

These jokes are usually offensive but read this list of dark humor jokes and you'll see they can be less offensive than you think if you open up your mind and you are willing to enjoy them.  

1
My wife and I have reached the difficult decision that we do not want children. If anybody does, please just send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.
2
Q: Why don鈥檛 cannibals eat clowns? A: Because they taste funny.
3
A blind woman tells her boyfriend that she鈥檚 seeing someone. It鈥檚 either really terrible news or really great news.
4
Even people who are good for nothing have the capacity to bring a smile to your face. For instance, when you push them down the stairs.
5
I was digging in our garden when I found a chest full of gold coins. I was about to run straight home to tell my wife about it, but then I remembered why I was digging in our garden.
6
What's the best part about dead baby Jokes? They never get old.
7
My grandfather says I鈥檓 too reliant on technology. I called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support.
8
I visited my friend at his new house. He told me to make myself at home. So I threw him out. I hate having visitors.
9
鈥淥h daddy,鈥 the kid said. 鈥淚 love you so much!鈥 鈥淗ey,鈥 the man responded. 鈥淯ntil we get the DNA test results, I鈥檓 just Harry to you!鈥
10
People are like trees... They fall when you hit them multiple times with an axe.
11
The other day, my wife asked me to pass her lipstick but I accidentally passed her a glue stick. She still isn鈥檛 talking to me.
12
If at first you don鈥檛 succeed鈥 Then skydiving definitely isn鈥檛 for you.
Steven Wright
13
I hate double standards. Burn a body at a crematorium, you鈥檙e 鈥渂eing a respectful friend.鈥 Do it at home and you鈥檙e 鈥渄estroying evidence.鈥
14
Today was a terrible day. My ex got hit by a bus. And I lost my job as a bus driver!
15
What鈥檚 the last thing to go through a fly鈥檚 head as it hits the windshield of a car going 70 mph? It鈥檚 butt.
16
I have a vest. If I had my arms cut off, it would be a jacket.
Mitch Hedberg
17
It鈥檚 important to have a good vocabulary. If I had known the difference between the words 鈥榓ntidote鈥 and 鈥榓necdote,鈥 one of my good friends would still be alive.
18
'I'm sorry' and 'I apologise' mean the same thing. Except at a funeral.
19
My girlfriend鈥檚 dog died, so I tried to cheer her up by getting her an identical one. It just made her more upset. She screamed at me, 鈥淲hat am I supposed to do with two dead dogs?鈥
20
Never break someone鈥檚 heart, they only have one. Break their bones instead, they have 206 of them.

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