✅ 100 Funny Inspirational Quotes

19/10/2020 12:00h

100 Funny Inspirational Quotes To Make You Laugh | iSTOCK

100 Funny Inspirational Quotes

There are many inspirational quotes you can read, but what if we add a bit of fun to them? I'm sure you've read thousands of quotes that aim to inspire us in our daily life; they surely achieve their goal, but on this occasion, we wanted to inspire and also make you laugh out loud. Finding humour in everything that happens to us in life is what keeps us sane.

It's time to release some endorphins by reading these quotes that we have compiled for you. These funny inspirational quotes will give you a lift and make you smile. There's no better way to start your day! Enjoy!

1"If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito."

Dalai Lama

2"Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work."

Thomas Edison

3"I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific."

Lily Tomlin

4"You must learn from the mistakes of others. You can’t possibly live long enough to make them all yourself."

Sam Levenson

5"Aspire to inspire before we expire."

Lisa Lieberman-Wang

6"Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition."

Marilyn Monroe

7"I find television very educational. Every time someone turns it on, I go in the other room and read a book."

Groucho Marx

8"I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work."

Thomas A. Edison

9"I could be a morning person if they were at 1pm."

Unknown

10"If you fall, I'll always be there."

The Floor

11"A diamond is merely a lump of coal that did well under pressure."

Unknown

12"If you’re going to be thinking, you may as well think big."

Donald Trump

13"Do not listen to those who weep and complain, for their disease is contagious."

Lisa Lieberman-Wang

14"If you’re going through hell, keep going."

Winston Churchill

15"Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive."

Elbert Hubbard

16"You must pay for your sins. If you have already paid, please ignore this notice."

Sam Levenson

17"A day without sunshine is like, you know, night."

Steve Martin

18"Be happy, it drives people crazy."

Lisa Lieberman-Wang

19"If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?"

George Carlin

20"People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day."

A.A. Milne

21"People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing – that’s why we recommend it daily."

Zig Ziglar

22"Some people are like clouds, when they disappear, it’s a beautiful day."

Lisa Lieberman-Wang

23"It took me fifteen years to discover I had no talent for writing, but I couldn’t give it up because by then I was too famous."

Robert Benchley

24"Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight."

Phyllis Diller

25"The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces."

Will Rogers

26"It’s okay to look at the past and the future. Just don’t stare."

Lisa Lieberman-Wang

27"The elevator to success is out of order. You’ll have to use the stairs…one step at a time."

Joe Girard

28"When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye."

Cathy Guisewite

29"A clear conscience is a sure sign of a bad memory."

Mark Twain

30"Optimist: someone who figures that taking a step backward after taking a step forward is not a disaster, it’s more like a cha-cha."

Robert Brault

31"Don’t worry about the world coming to an end today. It is already tomorrow in Australia."

Charles Schulz

32"When I hear somebody sigh, Life is hard, I am always tempted to ask, ‘Compared to what?'"

Sydney Harris

33"You can’t always control who walks into your life, but you can control which window you throw them out."

Lisa Lieberman-Wang

34"The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment you get up in the morning, and does not stop until you get into the office."

Robert Frost

35"Always remember that you are unique – just like everybody else."

Unknown

36"Age is of no importance unless you’re a cheese."

Billie Burke

37"Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings."

Robert Bloch

38"The difference between genius and stupidity is; genius has its limits."

Albert Einstein

39"Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won’t expect it back."

Oscar Wilde

40"The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up."

Mark Twain

41"We make mistakes because life doesn’t come with instructions."

Lisa Lieberman-Wang

42"Tell the negative committee that meets inside your head to sit down and shut up."

Ann Bradford

43"My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far I’ve finished two bags of M&Ms and a chocolate cake. I feel better already."

Dave Barry

44"Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow."

Mark Twain

45"You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to live to be a hundred."

Woody Allen

46"If you’re going to be able to look back on something and laugh about it, you might as well laugh about it now."

Marie Osmond

47"First they ignore you, then they ridicule you, then they fight you, and then you win."

Mahatma Gandhi

48"If you don’t know where you are going, you might wind up someplace else."

Yogi Berra

49"When I went to school, they asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. I wrote down ‘happy’. They told me I didn't understand the assignment, and I told them they didn’t understand life."

John Lennon

50"Failure is the condiment that gives success its flavor."

Truman Capote

51"Whoever said, ‘It’s not whether you win or lose that counts,’ probably lost."

Martina Navratilova

52"I intend to live forever. So far, so good."

Steven Wright

53"Even if you are on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there."

Will Rogers

54"Happiness is just sadness that hasn’t happened yet."

Unknown

55"If you hit the target every time, it’s too near or too big."

Tom Hirshfield

56"Here is a test to find whether your mission on earth is finished: If you’re alive it isn’t."

Richard Bach

57“All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure.”

Mark Twain

58“There never was a child so lovely but his mother was glad to get him asleep.”

Ralph Waldo Emerson

59“Luck is what you have left over after you give 100 percent.”

Langston Coleman

60“Opportunity does not knock, it presents itself when you beat down the door.”

Kyle Chandler

61“Life is a shipwreck but we must not forget tossing in the lifeboats.”

Voltaire

62“It takes less time to do things right than to explain why you did it wrong.”

Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

63"Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that who cares?... He’s a mile away and you’ve got his shoes!"

Billy Connolly

64“If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?”

Abraham Lincoln

65“Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invariably they are both disappointed.”

Albert Einstein

66“All the things I really like to do are either immoral, illegal or fattening.”

Alexander Woollcott

67“The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.”

Andy Rooney

68“I don’t believe in astrology; I’m a Sagittarius and we’re skeptical.”

Arthur C. Clarke

69“My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I’m right.”

Ashleigh Brilliant

70“Trouble knocked at the door, but, hearing laughter, hurried away.”

Benjamin Franklin

71“Money won’t buy happiness, but it will pay the salaries of a large research staff to study the problem.”

Bill Vaughan

72“If you’re going to tell people the truth, be funny or they’ll kill you.”

Billy Wilder

73“When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President. I’m beginning to believe it.”

Clarence Darrow

74“High heels were invented by a woman who had been kissed on the forehead.”

Christopher Morley

75“Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.”

Dale Carnegie

76“Laughing at our mistakes can lengthen our own life. Laughing at someone else’s can shorten it.”

Cullen Hightower

77“If you can’t live without me, why aren’t you dead already?”

Cynthia Heimel

78“Wisdom comes from experience. Experience is often a result of lack of wisdom.”

Terry Pratchett

79“The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept.”

George Carlin

80“Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds.”

Albert Einstein

81“I figured something out. The future is unpredictable.”

John Green

82“A mind is like a parachute. It doesn’t work if it is not open.”

Frank Zappa

83“The digital camera is a great invention because it allows us to reminisce. Instantly.”

Demetri Martin

84“A failure is like fertilizer; it stinks to be sure, but it makes things grow faster in the future.”

Denis Waitley

85“The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity.”

Dorothy Parker

86“To err is human; to admit it, superhuman.”

Doug Larson

87“If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.”

Earl Wilson

88“I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn’t work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.”

Emo Philips

89“Leave something for someone but dont leave someone for something.”

Enid Blyton

90“Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.”

Erma Bombeck

91“Good advice is something a man gives when he is too old to set a bad example.”

Francois de La Rochefoucauld

92“I’m in shape. Round is a shape.”

George Carlin

93“Whoever said money can’t buy happiness didn’t know where to shop.”

Gertrude Stein

94“If you’re going to do something tonight that you’ll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late.”

Henny Youngman

95“All men are equal before fish.”

Herbert Hoover

96“Age is just a number. It’s totally irrelevant unless, of course, you happen to be a bottle of wine.”

Joan Collins

97“Why is there so much month left at the end of the money?”

John Barrymore

98“Life is hard. After all, it kills you.”

Katharine Hepburn

99“If you’re too open-minded; your brains will fall out.”

Lawrence Ferlinghetti

100“Worrying is like paying a debt you don’t owe.”

Mark Twain