Funny Quotes
If "7 out of 10 men suffer from hemroids," does that mean the other 3 enjoy them?
Art Wojtasik
10 things that sound dirty in golf:
- Look at the size of his putter
- Oh, dang, my shaft's all bent
- You really wacked the hell out of that sucker
- After 18 holes I can barely walk
- My hands are so sweaty that I can't get a good grip
- Lift your head and spread your legs
- You have a nice stroke, but your follow through leaves a lot to be desired
- Just turn your back and drop it
- Hold up, I have to wash my balls
- Damn, I missed the hole again
A drunken man's words are a sober man's thoughts.
It's not the length, it's not the size, it's how many times you can make it rise!
Work harder: People on welfare depend on you.
Bumper Sticker
Mom + Dad + beer - condom = me.
Some kid's online profile
Is it because light travels faster than sound that some people appear bright until they speak?
Avoid hangovers: stay drunk.
It's better to shoot for the stars and miss, than to aim at a pile of shit and hit!
As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in schools.
Written on desk at Edinboro University of Pennsylvania
Heck is where people go who don't believe in gosh.
Bumper Sticker
Life is like a boner: long and hard.
Life is like a midget at a urinal: you always gotta be on your toes!
Senior's quote from a CBA yearbook
Arguing over the internet is like the special olympics: if you win you're still retarded.
Girls want a lot of things from one guy. Conversely, guys want one thing from a lot of girls.
After all this is Hollywood, where the diamonds are real and the breasts are fake.
Nathan Lane
It's not that I am anti-social. I just don't like you.
T-shirt
Improper use may result in injury or death
Towel Dispenser
I've got problem for your solution...
We're not lost. We're just locationally challenged.
John M. Ford
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